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I hate when people say you don't need alcohol to have fun... Well you don't need running shoes to run but it fucking helps.

Life is very beautiful...., when you know how to celebrate your pain...

Men: if you ever want to know what a woman's mind feels like,imagine a browser with 2,837 tabs open.

All.The.Time.

If this is to end in fire, we should all burn together.

$Once you get in --> __ _______________ \ / ___________ \ \ / / _________ \ \ \ / / / _____ \ \ \ \ / / / / \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ \ bold_/ / / / / \ \ \ \_______/ / / / \ \ \__________/ / / \ \_____________/ / \________________ / Can't get out$

The downside to having a good sense of humour and being able to laugh at yourself, is that people think you can't be hurt.

The world is
a magical place
filled with people
just waiting
to be offended
by something.

$PE CE ________ ` - - - - - .\ ______ , ` - - - - \\ . - . / . - - - ` , __ ` - - - . ` - ` ' >A- -` ` , _ . - . /` . - ` ' , ___ . ' " W R$

I was gonna take over the world
this morning, but I overslept.

Postponed.

Again.

Shout out to everyone who has seriously looked up whether it was legal to marry food

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