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Ladies, lets take extra long to look stunning for all the guys we'll be ignoring tonight.

137

that awkward moment when I'm drunk
and you're still ugly

125

* *

Hello.
I find you simply fantastic.
Please repost this message and tag someone who you think the same of.

* *

43

C'EST
LA
FUCKING
VIE

54

I need a glass of wine.
Or a bottle.
Or a winery in Italy.

102

the brain is the most important human organ, it works 24/7/365.
from the beginning of your life till the moment you fall in love...

104

Men: if you ever want to know what a woman's mind feels like,imagine a browser with 2,837 tabs open.

All.The.Time.

96

before you SPEAK, LISTEN. before you ACT, THINK. before you QUIT, TRY. before you SHIT, look for PAPER.

46

I don't give a fuck.
I mean I do, but fuck it.

37

The downside to having a good sense of humour and being able to laugh at yourself, is that people think you can't be hurt.

86

"Be a good
person, but
don't waste
time to prove it."

108

Let me tell you a bit about my background...

Well, It's green.

42

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