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Oh, my darling, it's true.


Beautiful things have dents and scratches, too.

but boss ... what's wrong with giving up work for lent?
No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.
In America, they say the only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun. 

But that just sounds like someone trying to sell two guns.
stuck between “i don’t wanna feel that type of hurt again” and “i wanna feel that type of love again”






H A P P Y   

D E S I G N A T E D  

L O V E   

D A Y









Let's be happy.

Assholes hate that.
The idea that there is a stairway to Heaven and a highway to Hell says a lot about the anticipated traffic load



You can scrape 
all you want, 
but you'll always know you've hurt me once 
real bad. 


                           
                           - Burnt Toast
The school shooter today didn't act alone. 

He was assisted by the President, 52 Senators, and the NRA.
Allowing yourself to 
be vulnerable is the biggest 
show of strength.




Who needs six words anyway?




It's 3:00AM Saturday morning. 
You know you're drunk when you're sitting on the toilet trying to put your seat belt on.
I'LL NEVER FORGET THE FIRST WORD'S I LEARNED FROM MY DAD_OR THE TASTE OF THE SOAP MY MOM USED SHORTLY AFTERWARDS !

I shot the Cupid
But I didn't shoot
His destiny.






    By the way, I forgive you. 





If you think about it since you dont remember being a baby there had to have been a time when you suddenly realised you were alive but nobody knows when



Something subtle 
Pained my soul
Like a splinter in my heart
And the truth Called out
Like a ragging wind
And tore my world apart.
the problem with "treat yourself" is that i don't know how to stop. i had a bad day in december and i've been treating myself ever since.
I get road rage walking behind people
I think I'm approaching my "Best before" date.


     Boldomatic
               is
         my gym




                                O N C E

                                U P O N

                            H A P P I L Y

                                 E V E R

                                A F T E R
Sometimes I comment on a bold so I can effectively 'subscribe' to the comments on that particular post. 

Repost if you do the same!

           O 
                o
         °
don't burst my bubble
                °
         O  
   
             o
I think I'm approaching my "Best before" date.

We are not there yet





      Hope leaves the body silently
six people and 
a bottle.







Your mind 
will give up 
before your 
body does.




So...are we there yet?





She didn't mean to fart!
Bad laws evoke bad behavior


Somebody cook for me please.

I swear it wasn't me.
Cutting corners leads to disaster!




Best Boldies in the world!
Sometimes I comment on a bold so I can effectively 'subscribe' to the comments on that particular post. 

Repost if you do the same!
I thought he'd choose me
What number SPF blocks people?




Love, in cahoots with luck
It's not nice to lie
why
  don't
     we fly
         away
blame it on the gods


Dear Life:

Why me everytime?


Save oxygen keep stories short

My wife caught me having an affair.
She noticed I was going out without food on my clothes.
You do your best thinking right before  you're  about to fall asleep. It's within those very few moments that you're in touch with your dreams but awake enough to  truly listen to them..

It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.
laundry today 
or 
naked tomorrow
You look like something 
I draw with my left hand.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying,

"I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
My internet was down for 5 minutes so I went downstairs and spoke to my family.

They seem like nice people.
Whenever I delete an app on my phone, 
the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •
My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"
I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT





     LISTEN TO SILENCE

If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything
I love waving at random people,  because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself
Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM
i just burnt my tongue on some food 

they say the ones you love hurt you the most


THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.
others have sex in the kitchen, I eat in bed
justice is
a beautiful concept.
unicorns too.

Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.


If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
Sun goes down earlier for short people.
I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty 


and I could not have described it any better
10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion. 

90% are due to wrong tone of voice.