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I'm no good at love poems.
I just want you to know that you make my pee-pee feel funny.

I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas.

They asked me why I don't have tattoos...
so I told them:

"Do you see a Ferrari
with bumper stickers?"

call me old fashioned, but i think your shorts should be longer than your vagina.

I'm not creepy enough

So people sit next to me on the bus

Sushi is Japanese for 'you'll still be hungry'.

People are
assholes. Just
make sure you're
not the toilet paper.

$| | | | | | | | ___|___ ___|___ | | | | | O _ | | _ o~ | | /| | | |\ | | / \ | | / \ | | ______ | | ______ |$

$o o o o__ __o__/_ <| \ < | > < | > < | v / \ \o / \ / \ < > \o/ v\ \o/ o/ \o | | <\ | <|__ __|> o__/_ / \ \o / \ / \ | \o/ v\ \o/ o/ \o \o/ | <\ | /v v\ | / \ < \/> <\/ \ _\o__/_$

The more I know you, the more I love you.

Although the constant shadow of certain death looms over everyday, the pleasures and joys of life can be so fine and affecting that the heart is nearly stilled in astonishment.

I came online to check the weather.

That was 11 years ago.

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