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Posts Liked by luke

Muss dringend einkaufen, habe nur noch Licht im Kühlschrank.

9

$Whenever I read "lol" I see a stick figure raising his arms in laughter! lol | / \$

16

Without the wound the pearl is never found

2

no one admits to them, everyone does them, no one likes them on others, everyone loves them on them; sins, what a mystical condemn.

1

"one last time" has become a habit, not a promise.

22

do something today that your future self will thank you for

28

Such florid details of bouquet proportion brought olfactory satisfaction to insects swallowed in a loud yawp by the Venus Fly Trap

3

I'M A BAD PERSON WITH A GOOD CONSCIENCE.

2

peace, a double-edged sword..., as long as we turn it on ourselves, there can be no blunting for our brethern

2

Fireflies, tiny fairies, solstitial bandits, steal pieces of the sun to paint the night for romantic interludes

16

Most of the time I am convinced I have lost it. But sometimes, I think I am the main line of truth in the universe.

50

I HAVE THE BODY OF A GOD

(unfortunately
it's Buddha)

140

If it hurts when you bang your head against the wall, dont do that.

15

Don't grow up, it's a trap.

70

Those who are heartless, once cared too much.

162

Darling, the distance between your dreams and reality is called action.

56

Telegram is the next WhatsApp.
And I'm not talking about the app.

7

Philosophy is unnecessary like art. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.

15

"the problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never be sure whether they are true"
- Mark Twain

2

I'm breaking up with the internet.

6

Wir leben alle unter dem gleichen Himmel, aber wir haben nicht alle den gleichen Horizont!

12

I wish you would listen closer to the songs I play.

The lyrics are the words I fail to say.

11

Boldomatic is a anti-social text-only social network.

14

Sillycon alley.

9

Calvanists make good programmers.

Everything is pre-compiled.

4

Make peace not flamewar.

10

nothing like passing a lady clearly over 70 wearing the same shirt as you to make you question your fashion sense .. and life in general really

22

How do you expect to find peace for 7 billion when you can't even find it for 1 ?

5

Stop blaming hormones for the fact that you lack virtue

6

Shouldn't selfies
be called narcies?

4

sheepster

4

Stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone ought to be.

8

I participated in this week's contest.

8

Dictatorship naturally arises out of democracy,
and the most aggravated from of tyranny and slavery out of the most extreme liberty.

14

Those
kilometers
aren't walking themselves

3

Nietzsche was right; and he's dead because we killed him.

3

boldness points/
total # of posts=

Bold IQ

4

Anyone can deconstruct;

It's only the precious few that can reconstruct.

4

why buy expensive lingerie
when you only wear it for
5 minutes?

6

I'm not saying you're a slut, but if your vagina had a password it would be '1234'.

28

Sorry, but your password must contain a capital letter, two numbers,
a symbol, an inspiring message, a spell,
a gang sign,
a hieroglyph and the blood of a virgin.

170

make hummus not walls

6

Comparison is the thief of joy.

20

last day of my 4 week 'no-booze-ramadan'

6

Dear Noah,

we could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving 'till 5.

Sincerly,
Unicorns

127

rolling up to my office...

the skatepark

9

Federer loses the point with a backhand unforced error.

1

Everyone talks about leaving the planet a better place for our kids.

How about we focus on leaving better kids for our planet.

23

Is anybody really happy?

7

First
love.

17

oh weihnachtszeit,
du pseudo-christliche, konsumgeile schlange

10

I broke up with my gym. We're just not working out.

10

Thor's up all night to get Loki

11

The truth is, everyone's going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.

- Bob Marley

178

Silence is golden,
unless you have kids, then silence is just suspicious.

9

All these sneaky product placements are making me Sony.

15

Findet ihr TV Gewinnspiele auch zu einfach?

A) Ja
B) Bratwurst

16

pur ist der purist der pur isst

2

The next
generation.

The next
enervation.

12

choose two of these:
••••••••••••••••••••••••

a job that's fun

a job that pays well

a job thats legal

••••••••••••••••••••••••

...see?

28

what a hugstorm!

5

How many Arduino controllers do you have?

4

immer was los, weisch

1

ei oder huhn?

2

morchelrahmsaucse is the best!!!!

2

englisch isch so lame..

10

Screw all these dynamically typed hipster languages. I'm going back to the roots with Fortran and Cobol.

7

Before the invention of tourism travel was considered a study. And it's rewards were the adornment of the mind and the formation of the judgment.

4

Hab heute Morgen um 6 Uhr zum Spass mit der Schneeschaufel übers Trottoir gekratzt.

Da gingen aber die Rollos hoch!

15

Men: if you ever want to know what a woman's mind feels like,imagine a browser with 2,837 tabs open.

All.The.Time.

8

Als die Geduld verteilt wurde, stand ich gerade hupend im Stau!

8

Wer Stroh im Kopf hat, fürchtet den Funken der Wahrheit.

16

Einfach mal mit Wanderschuhen und einem Korb in die Hallenbad-Garderobe und schreien:

"Die Pilz-Saison
ist eröffnet!"

8

sie führen kriege die wir hassen und definieren werte die wie lieben...

8

red wine:

a secret's worst enemy

29

wär staubsugt am morge am 7i ?

7

Hab einem Hipster ins Bein geschossen.

Jetzt hopster!

17

SEX, HUGS
AND SOCKS
WITH HOLES

62

C+#

7

fuck it's
hot!

6

enklavEU

3

barzelona?

3

AFROBEAT WEATHER!

4

habemus cornflakes?

5

*ding*

aargauerfalle

VBZ

3

<-Ferrophil->

2

Wenn Dummheit blaue Flecken machen würde, wäre die Welt voller Schlümpfe!

13

I'm not saying i'm Batman.

I'm just saying no one has ever seen me and Batman in a room together!

8

i'm no fat.

i'm just easy to see!

13

social media is one big game of word-association. comment the first thing that comes to mind!

3

won't you come over and love me?

3

grillieren

parkieren

assimilieren

8

ich find es war ein schöner sommer.

5

We live in an age where unnecessary things are our only necessities.

21

potz blitz! me chönt meine, d'Zürchen hend grad e iisziit überstande!

5

TRIO FROM HELL, yeah

2

vorhut uf französisch:

avant-garde!

8

hallo sonne

3

5 von 6 Menschen mögen russisches Roulette!

7

you möst listen when the boss is speaking... or i will use my pipe

[erich und die frauen.srf]

5

first world metal problems: bought merch from the first band...had to hold it for the whole show

4

standard creepiness rule: dont date under (age/2 +7)

[xkcd.314]

1

zrappi redez no fascht normal

4

dark thoughts @ worlds
end

4

marzo
tempo
pazzzoo!!!

4

like if you're stupid!

10

heilanddonner

3

Warum einen Mann wollen, wenn du eine Bettflasche haben kannst?

Spricht nicht, schnarcht nicht und gibt trotzdem warm!

13

allein

allein

9

alles im anke

5

Du siehst heute wieder specktakulär aus.

Aua!

10

I'm sick about all the Irish stereotypes!
As soon as I finish this drink, I'm punching someone.

504

laundry today
or
naked tomorrow

1298

laundry today
or
naked tomorrow

1298

Think outside the box.

Said the man who's writing in a box.

20

I miss my pre-internet brain...

22

Atheism is a non-prophet organization .

30

skål!
to
bold!

10

kennsch? dezent schminke?

8

i've
fallen
in love
with you,

but you
don't exist.

533

Wrong is wrong,
even if everyone is doing it. Right is right, even if no one is doing it.

25

laundry today
or
naked tomorrow

19

Wir bringen sie hin und wieder zurück.

21

Erich...

...schizophrener
kann ein Name nicht sein!

6

Erich...

...schizophrener
kann ein Name nicht sein!

6

I should probably unleash my trading bot onto the NYSE.

8

chrüsimüsi

11

I wake up everyday intending to be productive and then a voice in my head says "Haha good one!" and we laugh and laugh and take a nap.

7

Whenever I delete an app on my phone,
the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •

532

id rather be hated for who i am then to be loved for someone im not.

9

rebels without a cause

3

[objectiveC is:ugly andSucks:ass];

7

I'm not a proctologist.
But I know an asshole when I see one •

6

It's so hard being a single mum when you have no kids and are a male teenager.

7

allein allein...

und das Herz schreit!

6

sie entpuppte sich als Pferd im Kuhpelz

7

swiss

+

355

Design is so simple, that's why it is so complicated.

240

I have an idea.

You sit back, you relax and you die unnoticed.

232

Er: Erwischt seine Freundin mit einem anderen im Bett.

Sie: Ich kann dir alles erklären.

Er: Abseits, erklär mir Abseits!?

10

$/\ • / \ /|\. / \ ~~~~\__/\___/~~|~~~~~~~~~~ | <((((<. | | >{|||||}>* >]]]> >|||> <{{{{<$

11

Morgens mit dem Mercedes vorfahren und die ganzen Homies mitnehmen.

Schon ein cooler Macker, dieser Busfahrer!

12

I remember the days when computer programs weren't called «apps».

38

you can't have both feet on the ground and kick ass at the same time

285

SCHAFF MAL!!!!

5

We see what we believe and to change what we see it is sometimes necessary to change what we believe.

10

Today I took a picture of my peanut butter sandwich.

208

Und du bist dann wohl Prinz und Gaul in einem!?

9

I have an application here that can throw grenades into people’s dreams.

13

Bin heute morgen in der Dusche ausgerutscht.

Hab versucht mich am Wasserstrahl festzuklammern.

Hat nicht funktioniert!

8

Erstes Mikaslowsche Gesetz: wechsle nie die Kasse!

5

etc.

end of thinking capacity

3

What would Sean Connery do?

7

10% American,
20% European,

70% Hipster.

17

Boldomatic killed my Tamagotchi.

16

Tell someone
you love them today,
because life is short.

But shout it at them
in German,
because life is also
terrifying and
confusing!

14

One Night Stands kommen und gehen - buchstäblich!

6

what ever happened to sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll?
all we've got left is aids, crack and techno!

179

what ever happened to sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll?
all we've got left is aids, crack and techno!

50

us prinzip in mcdonalds

4

Everything is made in China. Except babies. They are made in vaChina.

265

Some days, the best thing about my job is that the chair spins.

238

(modern logic) technology: that salvific force that will fix all the problems that it creates

1

Der Kurs

"Umgehen lernen
mit Enttäuschungen"

findet heute nicht statt.

12

Instagram is so 2012

2013 is Boldomatic!

14

Mach dir keine Sorgen über die Zukunft, die schaffts auch ohne dich!

11

I myself am entirely made of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

128

'I never said half the crap people said I did.'

Albert Einstein

11

Ich bin ein eierlegender Wollmilchhengst!

6

Das Niveau mancher Menschen hat im Keller noch Höhenangst!

6

If Boldomatic is Instagram for text, what is Instagram for Boldomatic?

19

WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

105

ununterbrochen. das hohe C. mit der Rückhand.

3

how fast is fast

1

Im Supermarkt

"Möchten Sie 'ne Tüte?"

"Nee, wenn ich jetzt kiffe, vergesse ich wieder alles!"

4

sorry sir, your
car is rocking!

4

Bite marks are love notes written in flesh.

162

Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?”

46

Inkompetenz
kompensations
kompetenz

10

Everyday
is a gift, that’s why they call it the present.

34

Du Schatz, kann es sein, dass du eines unserer Kinder unfair behandelst?

Welches? Felix, Tim oder das Fette?

26

Don't feel sorry for yourself. Only assholes do that.

13

JESUS LOVES GAYS

7

BEAST
MODE

» ON

203

Life is too short for ejecting USB sticks.

41

I HATE BEING
BIPOLAR
IT IS AWESOME

340

PROVE
YOU
EXIST

197

don't steal.
the government hates competition.

158

The pieces of the puzzle:

marriage
children
home ownership
car ownership
television
retirement savings
funeral arrangements

7

We forfeit three-quarters of ourselves in order to be like other people.

5

I hate the part of the morning where I have to get out of bed and participate in real life •

200

An Apple a day keeps Windows away.

40

what if you just started licking the dentists fingers while they were in your mouth...

160

Your wish has been granted:

Double-Tap to like posts.

175

ein pferd am rande ist eine schande

11

Overhearing at a coffee shop in Toronto:

"Really what I want is CEO ... what I really need is more people like me ... I'm much more convincing than the others ... free labor is abundant."

Hipster MBA bullshit.

5

Die Logik ist eine Brücke, aber nicht jeder Weg führt über sie.

8

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