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Free coffee is the only reason people have jobs.

22

Work with children, and you'll never work a day in your life. Have your own children, and you'll never be unemployed.

26

I just hired a beaver to convert my wooden dildo into headphones.

15

My favorite Jobs:

1. Blow
2. Steve

17

B&B

Boobs and Bums

Auditions Today

12

I'm not saying I'm smarter than Steve Jobs, but I would have made the iPhone chargers a few feet longer.

12

seek your most hated enemy and give each other a peace job

12

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice.

12

No matter how old the president is at the time he is sworn in~ he will look like a gray haired senior citizen when he leaves office 4 or 8 years later:(

13

"We don't lick people"

Lies adults tell kids.

11

The only way to
do great work is
to love what you do.
If you haven't found it yet, keep looking.

~ Steve Jobs

10

I have careered
From career
To career

But I'm still here

9

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