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we kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.

enjoy your Boldomatic posts twice, in the mo-ment and in retrospect




Try not to trip over
my Amazingness
today-

It's everywhere



A swift kick in the balls will solve your gender confusion


                  •Clint Eastwood

I came
I saw
I forgot 
What I was doing.
I went back
Got distracted
And have no idea
What's going on.
Is this my cup?

I have to pee.
Some people can't handle flowery speech.

Pansies.
I GOT A BOOK FROM THE LIBRARY ABOUT OILS AND LUBRICANTS. 
IT WAS IN THE NON-FRICTION  SECTION.
Karma is the most patient gangster ever.






 
 I'm a challenge.
ME: WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE A PAPERCLIP NAMED CLIPPY WOULD HELP ME WRITE LETTERS TO MY FRIENDS. 
KID: SURE GRANDMA LET'S GET YOU TO BED.
GOGGY TALES #2:   while the dog in me..  likes monogamy..  the girl in me wants to roam...   but since girls who date double..  tend to get in big trouble..  i'll leave your husband alone.
the most important thing you wear is your personality




No one mentioned
being older required
so much medication
the sad reality is that it is far more profitable to be an astrologist than an astronomer.
GOGGY TALES #4/When Good Dogs Crossbreed:   if you cross a Bulldog with a Shitzu, you get a BULLSHITZ - a gregarious but likeable breed

even on Boldomatic, be a voice with a smile




When women get to a 
certain age, they start
collecting Lots of Cats


This is called; Many Paws
I SHOULD LIKE TO BURY SOMETHING PRECIOUS IN EVERY PLACE WHERE I'VE BEEN HAPPY AND THEN, WHEN I'M OLD AND UGLY AND MISERABLE, I COULD COME BACK AND DIG IT UP AND REMEMBER.

how much longer will this music play? Do I have to get my drums out again soon?



Apparently it is rude to poke someone in the forehead and say 'skip intro' when they're not getting to the point. 

I know that now.
im the kind of gal that like to whisper sweet things in a guys ear after sex like: hey - go home!
I don't judge people based on their personality. 

I judge them by their taste in music.

               *                **
*.                        *

        **.                                      *

The Universe is alive
              within
                                       YOU
         ***
                                                      *.
**

less is more if you have enough
Dicks.com being a sporting goods website is one of the biggest letdowns of the internet.

Please
don't
love
somebody
 new.

once my father kissed the sun, my mother kept on signing her messages with
Mum&Dead


Near midnight, post St Paddy's day, please use soft indoor font




       
   Hope the Easter Bunny got his post

                                      (\_/) 
                                       0_o
                                      /  "  \ 
                      
        St Patrick Day's Eggs-presso?






 
 Do you feel me 
 the way I feel you?
You can't pretend you see some of it ...without seeing all 
of it.


  forgive
 yourself
All I want is friendship, loyalty, lasting love, orgasms, and tacos


You don't love a woman
because she is beautiful,
but she is beautiful 


because you love her

Happy 
St. Patrick's Day!

I wore my green today.

Did you?



            
                             A

            Wee                Bit

                        Irish
 

                     Today
PET DIARIES PT4/PG3 CATS:  I must try this again tomorrow,  but at the top of the stairs.  I  am convinced that the other prisoners here are nothing but flunkies n snitches. the dog rcvs special privileges: he is regularly released,  and seems more than happy to return.  he is obviously retarded.   the bird has got to be some kind of informant. i observe him communicate with the guards regularly.  i am certain he reports my every move. my captors have arranged protective custody for him  in an elevated cell, so he is safe.  ....for now.

Some people want to see you fail just to say “I told you so”

Some hope you fail so they can kick you while you're down.

Some want you to think you are a failure because they believe they are better than you. 

Disappoint them all.




Kindness is my nature


But fuck-off is my wingman
everyone is a wee bit irish on st. patrick's day - except the germans, we're still germans.

               *                **
*.                        *

        **.                                      *

The Universe is alive
              within
                                       YOU
         ***
                                                      *.
**
we kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.



A swift kick in the balls will solve your gender confusion


                  •Clint Eastwood
I don't judge people based on their personality. 

I judge them by their taste in music.
suffering happens when we try to force the external world to match our internal narrative.
GREEN IS THE HOPE
the coward only threatens when he is safe.
to measure up to all that is demanded of him, a man must overestimate his capacities.

It's not illegal. It's just frowned upon. Like masturbating on an airplane.
laundry today 
or 
naked tomorrow
You look like something 
I draw with my left hand.
There is a big difference between a guy and a girl saying,

"I went through an entire box of tissues during that movie."
Whenever I delete an app on my phone, 
the shaking icons make me feel like they're all panicked over who's getting axed •
My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"
I HOPE YOUR DAY IS AS NICE AS YOUR BUTT

If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.





     LISTEN TO SILENCE
With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything
I love waving at random people,  because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself
Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM
i just burnt my tongue on some food 

they say the ones you love hurt you the most


THIS "NORMAL" YOU SPEAK OF DOESN'T SOUND FUN AT ALL.

Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.
Sun goes down earlier for short people.


If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.
justice is
a beautiful concept.
unicorns too.
I wanted to write down exactly what I felt but somehow the paper stayed empty 


and I could not have described it any better
Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.
10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion. 

90% are due to wrong tone of voice.
I like to be alone. 
But I would rather be alone with you.
i've
fallen
in love
with you,

but you
don't exist.