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Nothing is scarier than the people who try to find easy answers to complicated questions.

71

I don't remember much from last night but the fact that I needed sunglasses to open the fridge this morning tells me it was awesome.

44

Seems like making peace with what you have is never enough.

36

I never met Satan, but I've dated his child.

13

show me
show me
show me
how you do that trick...

8

Here's a signed picture of my ass.

*

23

Open a bottle of wine and then open your heart, I'm coming home....

20

You can find
beauty
in loneliness
and disappointment
and pain
and never-satisfied love

but
it
is
cruel
beauty

22

When your username slowly becomes your real name....

...muhaha.

23

The universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a hell of a sense of humor.

Carrie Bradshaw

15

Excuse me while I go slip into something more alcoholic.

24

If I get any more sober
I may start asking where my pants are.

19

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