albertgualbert's Posts

The sign said "Free Lunch"

Little did I know that I was the main course...

Reposted from petegutz2

CurrentNobody likes this

Both vodka and vagina
start with "v".

Coincidence?

Reposted from UserOne

CurrentNobody and UserOne like this

My approach to being a good man is to act like a bra. I try to be supportive and help shoulder your burdens, but mostly I'm just there to touch your boobs.

Reposted from Sasquatchprime

perellano and CurrentNobody like this

I had a wet dream last night!

Passed out on the front lawn and woke up to find the sprinklers had turned on!

Reposted from petegutz2

perellano and CurrentNobody like this

Heart:
You should tell him how you feel.
Brain:
Don't you dare!!!
Alcohol:
Message sent.

Reposted from RoutineCost

perellano, janem803, CurrentNobody and RoutineCost like this

An idea that doesn't
work without colour
doesn't work at all.

Colour is secondary,
everything is bone
and shadow.

Reposted from Ziya

crafty and CurrentNobody like this

when you
finally find the
words... and
it's too late

Reposted from Ziya

perellano, CurrentNobody, janem803 and crafty like this

we are all fucked* up, some of us are just honest about it .

Reposted from anonymous

perellano, CurrentNobody and crafty like this

Nö öne is coming to save you.
This life is 100% yöur respönsibility.

madamem., eulekauzig, crafty and janem803 like this

There's probably nothing in my life I'd change except my bank balance!

Reposted from misterlab

crafty, ChrisRota and janem803 like this

Some people just speak fluent asshole.

Reposted from MyM

perellano, crafty and ChrisRota like this

The question isn't if you believe in God, but if you think God believes in you.

Reposted from Ziya

ChrisRota likes this

Childhood is when you idolize Batman. . . .

Adulthood is when you realize the Joker makes more sense. . . .

Reposted from Bettydent

you can't hack life,
live it

Reposted from timothy21

janem803 likes this

if you tell the truth, it becomes a part of your past...
if you tell a lie, it becomes a part of your future.

Reposted from siouxz

perellano, siouxz and janem803 like this

if you can't find a lawyer who knows the law, find a lawyer who knows the judge

Reposted from t_treeman

Mr & Mrs Wong have a baby boy.

The nurse brings out a WHITE baby boy.

The confused father says two Wongs don't make a White and they named him. . . . .

Sum Ting Wong

Reposted from Bettydent

Election and erection almost have the same spelling, but they have the same meaning -

A dick rising to power.

Reposted from manutd7770

perellano and ChrisRota like this

The bigger your shoes the bigger your dick, the bigger your car the smaller your dick. So call me a clown, I don't care!

Reposted from ErikSmit

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Reposted from Campo

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The sword of justice is stuck in a pile of dollar bills.

Reposted from sarcaSM

Assholes prefer victory over justice.

Reposted from Ziya

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With all due respect, give credit whom credit due.

ChrisRota and janem803 like this

I need a girl that'll make my nipples hard. Not my fucking life.

Reposted from leslucas

perellano, GreatSmile and janem803 like this

The present is Innovation And the past is Obsolete.

Reposted from Authlander

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You never change things by fighting the existing reality.
To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.

~ R. Buckminster Fuller

Reposted from UserOne

perellano, UserOne and ChrisRota like this

You get more by giving more!

Reposted from ErikSmit

ErikSmit, ChrisRota and janem803 like this

Apartheid was LEGAL
The Holocaust was LEGAL
Slavery was LEGAL
Colonialism was LEGAL

Legality is a matter
of power, not justice.

Reposted from Ziya

springfire and ChrisRota like this

get lost

stay there

Reposted from mediadeo

forgive them Father, for they know exactly what they do ...

Reposted from ChrisRota

ChrisRota likes this

I wish I could put some people on mute.

Reposted from KnightofSIAL

perellano and janem803 like this

Smile.
Someone is imagining you naked right now.
It's not me.
I swear.
Shit.

Reposted from SourceBlack

perellano, janem803 and SourceBlack like this

Alpha Phi Omega Prologue:
“We will build a new tomorrow from this old wrecked land of woe, build it high, build it strong, build it with cheerful services, build it with the strong men and women of Alpha Phi Omega”

Leave nothing but footprints
Take nothing but pictures
Kill nothing but
time

Reposted from Fionacatherine

janem803 likes this

Sometimes you've got to give yourself a break. No ambition, no goals, no projects, just you.

Reposted from juliettebravo

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Barred in the USA, Happy go lucky in the P.I.

janem803 likes this

Live Your Life Like No One Is Watching

Reposted from anonymous

lindaann, GreatSmile and janem803 like this

If Congress failed to pass the anti-dynasty law, then I guess there is an alternative for that: Pass a law that will pay higher taxes for each family members that belongs to a political dynasty, and that's what we called: Political Dynasty Tax Law :-)

Recycled leaders inherit wealth and are getting richer at the expense of government budget and their constituents.

albertgualbert likes this

In a society where plunderer is acceptable to the people is just another example of the culture of mediocrity that rules the Filipino's destiny.

perellano likes this

Don't listen
to what
people say,
watch
what they do.

Reposted from anonymous

janem803 likes this

Light has come into this world.

But men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil.

Reposted from Bettydent

Don't treat people as bad as they are, instead treat them as good as you are

Reposted from NerdWord

There is warmth and joy in life. Look a little closer and you'll find it.

Reposted from springfire

janem803 likes this

Speaking up for others is easier than speaking up for yourself.

Reposted from Ziya

InfluenceNoise likes this

A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, a Pagan, and an Atheist all walk into a coffee shop. . . .

. . . .and they talk, laugh, drink coffee and become good friends.

It's not a joke.
It's what happens when you're not an asshole.

Reposted from Bettydent

May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.

Reposted from Bettydent

bold likes this

IF YOU WAN'T TO MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY,
DON'T BE A LEADER- SELL ICE-CREAM!

Reposted from juneocallagh

albertgualbert likes this

It's alright to be down for now.

Just don't stay down.

Reposted from EmpressTygress

janem803, InfluenceNoise and GreatSmile like this

"To educate a person in mind and not in morals is to educate a menace to society."

Reposted from Ziya

"To educate a person in mind and not in morals is to educate a menace to society."

Reposted from Ziya

albertgualbert and InfluenceNoise like this

stop killing people you fucking twats

Reposted from Ziya

perellano, InfluenceNoise and Ziya like this

It's alright to be down for now.

Just don't stay down.

Reposted from EmpressTygress

albertgualbert likes this

It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.

Reposted from Ziya

you are the most real people I've never met

Reposted from Ziya

you
can't
troll a
troll

Reposted from Ziya

Love doesn't have to be painful.

Love can be peaceful.

Reposted from anonymous

$Divisive politics and fractured opinions are a cancer that has been willed upon our society by the politicians- they make policy and watch we rats fight in a frenzy over the inches of cage and scraps of dignity we have left. We trusted them to do right by us...Who are the fools now?$

Reposted from petegutz2

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Silence is better than unnecessary drama.

Reposted from guggigirl

InfluenceNoise likes this

The more labels you add, the more unnatural you become.

Reposted from Ziya

InfluenceNoise likes this

To everything in life,
connection is the key.

Reposted from Ziya

InfluenceNoise likes this

Signs and symbols rule the world, not words nor laws.

• Confucius

Reposted from Ziya

Krisargent, perellano and InfluenceNoise like this

I trust the next chapter
because I know the author

Reposted from Fionacatherine

A wise man usually has more questions than answers.

Reposted from MyM

The trouble with life is there's no background music.

Reposted from nathii

Well, as far as
I'm concerned,
I'm not here
to live
a normal life.
I'm sent here
on a mission.

Reposted from PueppiRazza

InfluenceNoise likes this

Behind every post is a secret message for someone.

Reposted from anonymous

perellano and InfluenceNoise like this

With the right words,
you can change the
world.

Reposted from Ziya

perellano and InfluenceNoise like this

When people cannot understand you, don't try too hard to be understood.

Reposted from Ziya

To err is human, to blame it on somebody else shows management potential.

Reposted from Sledge

Words are weaponized
emotions.

Choose
yours
with
absolute
clarity.

Reposted from Ziya

Equal justice, whether penal or compensatory, requires universal laws in order to achieve equality in application.

#justice, #equality

perellano and MyM like this

If you can't make someone happy, at least make them a coffee.

Reposted from Ziya

Ziya likes this

Be proud of yourself.
Celebrate YOU in all of your
fucked up, amazing, glory.
Because, you're winning,
even if you don't
think you are.

Reposted from JodieT

JodieT likes this

Starting tomorrow, whatever life throws at me,

I'm ducking
so it hits someone else.

Reposted from UserOne

perellano and UserOne like this

Our lives are
often swallowed
by our experience,
so fight hard, stay strong
and don't become
the things you suffer.

Reposted from Authlander

Authlander likes this

Forgiveness comes in several stages. But sometimes, and quite rarely, there comes a point in your life when you simply forget to give a shit.

Reposted from Ziya

Let's face it, the world is really run by a lot of dirty old men who get away with people just accepting it the way it is.

Reposted from Ziya

There are too many quick fixes in this world, and not enough
real solutions for
real-world problems.

Reposted from Ziya

We live in the age of entertainment.

Everyone's famous.

Reposted from SourceBlack

perellano and SourceBlack like this

In the twenty-first century, the real elites are those born not in the right family or the right class, but in the right country. Yet, this modern elite is scarcely aware of how lucky it is.

Reposted from Ziya

I don't care that they stole my idea.. I care that they don't have any of their own.

Reposted from avant-garde

perellano and emiledi77 like this

•
A RELAXED
MIND, IS A
CREATIVE
MIND

Reposted from LoveFunApps

What if your beliefs were not government funded?

Reposted from Ziya

Are you sure of
what
you're sure of?

Reposted from Bartjan

you can write a good joke out of your dirty mind
~ Green joke proverbs ~

I HATE WHEN PEOPLE SAY

"ACT LIKE AN ADULT"

HAVE YOU SEEN ADULTS LATELY?
THAT'S A HORRIBLE IDEA !

Reposted from juneocallagh

My life is a romantic comedy minus the romance and just me laughing at my own jokes.

Reposted from GaylrdSprFckr

emiledi77 likes this

HAVING A DIRTY MIND MAKES LIFE MUCH MORE FUN.

Reposted from stargater

Everything is the same thing
but with a different name

Reposted from SourceBlack

Life would be easier if
you could mark people
as spam.

Reposted from Dwell

perellano and Dwell like this

Words Have Weight

Reposted from wipkinger

have you heard the moon?

Reposted from SourceBlack

SourceBlack likes this

Can someone please send that North Korean bloke a fruit basket or something before he launches his stupid?

Reposted from TreatReality

Everything is the same thing
but with a different name

Reposted from SourceBlack

albertgualbert and SourceBlack like this

Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, it's never good enough.
Finally, you realize, that no matter what, the bias is so blinding, that they stick with what they're comfortable with, or even worse, they stick with what they think is popular, or what others want.
Unfortunately, that's such an injustice, to everyone else.
When anything is one sided, don't waist your precious time.
Move on.

Reposted from Deborah.A

i tried to put myself in your shoes but they were cheap and ugly.

Reposted from jaybyrd

perellano and jaybyrd like this

Nothing in my life
makes sense to
me... like you

Reposted from Ziya

Ziya likes this

If all people are like the minds of babies, then this world will be just smiling and laughing at the same time.

MyM and Authlander like this

burn all your
bridges and
one day you'll
find yourself
stranded •••

Reposted from purplechill

purplechill likes this

Not choosing is also a choice

Reposted from SourceBlack

perellano and SourceBlack like this

be honest when in trouble
be simple when in welth
be polite when in authority
be silent when in anger

Reposted from Quotrrr

Maybe what we really need is a softer focus on the important things in life.

Reposted from Ziya

Ziya likes this

Sex is a sensation
caused by a temptation.
A guy sticks his location, in a girls destination.
To increase population of the next generation.
Do you get my explanation or do you need a demonstration?

Reposted from Lirpae..

I don't believe in clarification, justification and confrontation -
The longer the explanation the bigger the lie !

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

perellano and sudeshnarocks like this

Don't judge a book by its cover rather judge a person by the size of the ketchup bottle in their fridge.

Reposted from GaylrdSprFckr

Judge a person by his/her sayings, don't judge the sayings by, who is saying.

Reposted from AjaySuwalka

When you feel that nobody loves you, nobody cares for you, everyone is ignoring you, and people are jealous of you. . .

You should really ask yourself. . .

"Am i too sexy ?!"

Reposted from Bettydent

It's cute
how everyone gets offended by everything and everyone.

Reposted from sarcaSM

I love my 2 jobs I married them (^^)

I like being single,
I'm always there
when I need me

Reposted from Fionacatherine

albertgualbert likes this

Reprogram your mind so your life can be easily back on track

Spending an awful lot of our hard earned money on fucking bullshit.

Reposted from dor1316

dor1316 likes this

Hard work won't kill you, but stress will...

Reposted from Mjau

I can't believe I work this hard to be this poor.

Reposted from dreamworld

WORK HARD,
SO YOU CAN SHOP HARDER

Reposted from avant-garde

perellano and BiteSenior like this

Ever go to bed and wake up like you never went to bed?

Reposted from MyM

i wonder if life smokes after it fucks me

Reposted from Fionacatherine

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Its empty when they are gone...

Cherish each person in your life.

You just never know when your last day together may be.

Reposted from anonymous

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Never regret a day in your life: good day give hapiness, bad day give experience, worst day give lessons, and best day give memories.

Reposted from Loupi4614

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Welcome to our society.
You will be judged on what you wear, your taste in music, what you look like and how you act.

- Enjoy your stay.

Reposted from binaboo__

Pass the tissues, we all have issues.

Reposted from BiteSenior

perellano and BiteSenior like this

Its ok to be weirded out by your own self.

Reposted from anonymous

am i free or am i tied up?

Reposted from rebekahlamb

Children killed in war,
Families dying for lack of food,
Drugs too costly for the poor.
What a shit species...

...but, celebrities.

Reposted from DominicLomax

perellano and DygytAlice like this

If I say trust me, that means I'm in love with you *~*

DygytAlice likes this

I'd risk
it all for you *

Reposted from Ziya

I am a writer, anything you say or do may be used in a story.

Reposted from SourceBlack

SourceBlack likes this

I DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP,
they hold you back.

I want a best friend i can sleep with, make love to, hustle with, travel with, shop with, club & live with.

I want a partner in crime, a life partner.
Someone i can laugh with and build with.

Somebody that I can trust with my heart, my money, and my life.
Somebody i am not afraid to lose because i know theyll always be there.
Relationships just aren't for me,
but a partnership. . . I'll take that.

Reposted from Bettydent

DON'T TRUST WHAT YOU SEE FOR EVEN SALT LOOKS LIKE SUGAR

Reposted from NerdWord

Friendship is the purest form of relationship, because it's built on trust.

Reposted from Belieber1994

laugh with many, but don't trust any.

~~Tupac

Reposted from jakobking13

It's important to have a woman who helps at home. A woman that can make you laugh. A woman you can trust and doesn't lie to you. A woman that's good in bed and likes to be with you. It's very important these 4 women don't know each other!

Reposted from misterlab

love all, trust few, do wrong to no one.

Reposted from againandagain

- be yourself
- be different
- be outstanding
- be someone
- don't cling on anyone
- don't give a fuck
- don't put too much hope
- less care , less hurts
- ignore others
- trust nobody
- think positive
ahmdsyaf_

Reposted from ahmdsyaf

only way to be SUCCESSFUL is by moving SLOW... because you may MISS a good turn and there is no REVERSE.

Reposted from ruhip

I love it when I turn you on. Right away you start touching every inch of my body. It feels sooo good, you make me all hot and wet. Thanks shower!!

Reposted from IO_N_O

If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments

Reposted from NukeSkywalker

Don't forget to fall in love with yourself first.

Reposted from Luenchen

If it requires pants or a bra, it's not happening today.

Reposted from BerlinGirl2014

less posts
less problem

more comments
more arguments

the more you stay cööl and relax
the less stress in life

More posts , more problem..
less posts, less problem..
no post, no problem!

Reposted from 2schaa

No fears no joys.
no hate, no love.
We can be more empty than we thought, we can watch stillness consume the vastness of the ocean ...we are motionless and quiet careful not to awaken the post-wave titan ,we are the black evergreen leaves littering the shoreline beneath the groves of dying shade-less trees . We are incomplete objects who slander the rising sun but we do it for the moon

Reposted from anonymous

lyfe and albertgualbert like this

Do hugs, not drugs.
Spread love, not legs.
Respect, don't judge.
Listen more, talk less.
Understand, don't assume.
Forgive and forget.

Reposted from kj55

kj55 likes this

Talk less, Think more , Work harder

Reposted from nash

Reposted from acos2

THE PROBLEM WITH POLITICAL JOKES IS THEY GET ELECTED.

Reposted from juneocallagh

perellano likes this

Maturity doesn' t
mean age,

it means sensitivity, manners, and
how you react.

Reposted from UserOne

perellano and UserOne like this

Words are a perfectly
acceptable weapon,
yet, they are not real.

Reposted from Ziya

there's no point in wasting time doing nothing...

unless there's something very important to do.

Reposted from Campo

Campo likes this

It doesn't matter where you come from. It matters where you stood still.

Reposted from Ziya

Words are a perfectly
acceptable weapon,
yet, they are not real.

Reposted from Ziya

Time for clear heads
and cool hearts.

Reposted from Ziya

I'm thankful for all of it..
The high, the lows. The blessings. The lessons. The setbacks. The comebacks.
The love. The hate.
Everything....

Reposted from sudeshnarocks

albertgualbert and sudeshnarocks like this

People who fake being weird are the worst. I fall for it every time.

Reposted from Ziya

you are not perfect,
i like you!

Reposted from hensch

always trust people who like big butts.

they can not lie.

Reposted from beesmoove

I am 97% Sure you
Don't Like Me.

But I am 100% Sure.
I Don't Care.
:-)

Reposted from gsmorin1

always trust people who like big butts.

they can not lie.

Reposted from beesmoove

Women are like iPhones..
you have to touch them all over before they respond.

Men are like Blackberries..
rub one ball and everything moves •

Reposted from Lirpae..

I'd like to offer moral support, but I have questionable morals.

Reposted from hemko

Here's to technology: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Reposted from dAn

it's
beer
o'clock

Reposted from Mediahunter

Dear Life

You have taught me things I never wished to learn.

Yours unthankfully

Me

Reposted from Ziya

perellano, albertgualbert, janem803 and Ziya like this

ego is like dust in the eyes: without clearing the dust, one cannot see anything clearly.

Reposted from siouxz

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do deaf people know

that farting makes noise?

Reposted from ZeepBella

perellano, ZeepBella and juneocallagh like this

Friends are like underwear, always near you
Good friends are like condom, always protecting you
Best friends are like viagra, lift you up when you are down

Reposted from Babs_77

JACK AND JILL WEN'T UP THE HILL TO HAVE A BIT OF FUN, SADLY JILL FORGOT HER PILL AND NOW THE HAVE A SON!

Reposted from juneocallagh

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My friends have made

the story of my life...

Reposted from BoomBangBoom

janem803 and BoomBangBoom like this

Create yourself a life
worth living for, and then - don't forget to live it. Every day. Non-stop.
24 hours a day. Live that
life. There's no escape.

Reposted from Ziya

albertgualbert likes this

Life is like a chemistry subject, it's a trial and error formula in a test tube.

BoomBangBoom likes this

Practice makes perfect. The more mistakes the more you will prevent it to happen again and that's how practice becomes perfect thru learning from the mistakes.

Earth is one the planet in the universe where law in each country has conflict in the enforcement and recognition of judgement.

Remember to piss
people off once in a
while. It's good for
their heart.

Reposted from Ziya

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The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence

Reposted from anonymous

perellano likes this

What is the value of free speech if we no longer have anything worthwhile to say?

Reposted from Ziya

perellano, siouxz and Ziya like this

If bedbugs are found on beds, who ever came up with the name cockroach?

Reposted from ErikSmit

perellano and ErikSmit like this

If I continue working two jobs I can eventually afford a holiday come 2025.

Reposted from chipdicks

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.

Reposted from UserOne

perellano and UserOne like this

Oh simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need someone to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know - KEANE

Meaning of "luho"

luho *

» synonyms and related words:

luxury
n.
1. the comforts of life beyond what are necessary

There is enough documents and evidence ready to slap your face that will make your allegations wrong.

albertgualbert likes this

If food and sleep is not the answer to every problem then you have insomnia and you don't live a beautiful life.

#food, #security, #home, #for, #the, #homeless, #foodforthehungry

siouxz likes this

“Criminals do not die by the hands of the law. They die by the hands of other men.”
#narco-politics #Philippines

Reposted from albertgualbert

“Criminals do not die by the hands of the law. They die by the hands of other men.”
#narco-politics #Philippines

perellano, janem803, prubton and Fionacatherine like this

reposted by albertgualbert

you've been appraised and your values appreciated so level up

janem803 and siouxz like this

Character is like an android applet if you forced to stop what is doing right it may misbehave.