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Posts Liked by cmejiap10

I've been waiting all winter to start complaining about the summer heat.

156

If it takes someone 12 minutes to get the straw into the Capri Sun, this should give you some indication as to what they are like in bed.

Back away slowly, then run fast, run far.

145

We're all
mad here.

163

Never ask a woman her age. Or her weight. Or anything. Just stare, breathe and hope for the best.

198

I saw myself in you.

You were everything I wanted to be.

145

to avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.

162

Here's to the nights that turned into mornings with the friends that turned into family.
Cheers to you.

196

Get rich or drunk trying.

122

If someone points at your black clothes and asks, whos funeral it is, you just look around the room, and answer, 'haven't decided yet.'

247

I just wanna dance on the highest roof with you while stars are shining and smiling at us.

128

PLEASE DO NOT FEED
THE FEARS

109

it's a good time to start something new. •

91

Bedtime is wonderful because I get to do two things I love: nap and worry.

83

today has been nothing that tomorrow can't cure

117

I like mysteries so I decided to become one.

137

a friend isn't your friend until they defend you in your absence

168

i want to fuck you so bad right now.

damn autocorrect..

i meant hey.

175

My doctor told me to watch my drinking so I found a few places with mirrors behind the bar.

110

What lies behind us,
what lies before us,
are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

142

Seeing a cockroach on your bed isn't the problem, the real problem would be if it disappeared. . . .

148

Sometimes it feels like the only thing I can count on, are my fingers.

192

You can't start monday if you keep dreaming of your last weekend.

109

middle fingers up if you dont give a fuck

146

DIFFICULT ROADS
OFTEN LEAD
TO BEAUTIFUL
DESTINATIONS

213

blood under your nails or it didn't happen

89

Be careful who you make memories with, those things can last forever.

235

the question is not what you look at, but what you see

147

your mind needs as much exercise as your body. thats why I think about jogging every day

152

I don't really want it if I have to show you how to give it.

122

TOO BAD THERE ISN'T A VACCINE AGAINST STUPIDITY.

122

Last night I dreamed that there was a room full of people exactly like me!

I hated them all.

112

I draw a line across your back to connect memories. Building bridges between the pain, the joy and the forgotten revelations. Sculpting future dreams from past feelings that were not mine to feel.
You're welcome.

84

Sometimes,
the right words
just show up at
the right time.

131

I'm at that awkward age where half my friends are in love and having babies and the other half are too drunk to even find their phones.

187

I will never be a morning person.

The moon and i are too much in love.

176

No matter where you are or where you grow up -

you always go through the same awkward moments of being a teenager and growing up and trying to figure out who you are

116

People keep asking me "how's it going" like I have any idea what's going on at any point.

68

People keep asking me "how's it going" like I have any idea what's going on at any point.

184

Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house...

69

Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house...

278

Unless you can question your own beliefs, you have no place questioning the beliefs of others.

41

Unless you can question your own beliefs, you have no place questioning the beliefs of others.

202

The new
normal
is born from
those that
were inspired
to go beyond
the optional

115

The new
normal
is born from
those that
were inspired
to go beyond
the optional

58

We
Are
Shaped
and
Fashioned
By
What We
Love

141

The world is full of nice people. If you can't find one...

be one.

324

The world is full of nice people. If you can't find one...

be one.

62

Of course size matters.....

Nobody wants a small cup of coffee.

218

my heart says: summer

my body says: no

60

my heart says: summer

my body says: no

203

I always start phone conversations with "my phone is about to die.." just so people don't waste my time.

70

I always start phone conversations with "my phone is about to die.." just so people don't waste my time.

238

Poor is the man whose pleasure depends on the permission of another.

50

Poor is the man whose pleasure depends on the permission of another.

193

The hands of friendship have no color.

112

The hands of friendship have no color.

232

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle

63

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle

344

When ego is lost, limit is lost. You become infinite, kind, beautiful.

270

The prettiest people do the ugliest things.

284

I almost had an "I need a guy moment" but then I was able to get the vodka open.

234

have you ever listened to someone for a while and wondered...

"who ties your shoelaces for you?"

43

have you ever listened to someone for a while and wondered...

"who ties your shoelaces for you?"

280

One of the most cruel acts that a human can do to another human, is to cause a person to lose hope.

323

One of the most cruel acts that a human can do to another human, is to cause a person to lose hope.

66

if these walls could talk, they'd say 'pick me up' & put me on 'em...

75

my back is not a voicemail say it to my face

59

my back is not a voicemail say it to my face

232

I just don't have the energy to shit butterflies and piss rainbows today.

178

you are the
tree standing
in the middle
of a hurricane
with both middle
fingers up in the air.

145

YOUR WORDS WILL LEAVE AN IMPRINT OF MEMORIES WHICH STORY'S YET BE TOLD

119

happimess

177

Truth;
why have you abandoned me?

83

One day, I will solve my problems with maturity.

Today, however, it will be with alcohol.

219

it's all
i let
come between us

104

admit it: life didn't fuck you,
it taught you.

160

the lion and tiger might be powerful...
but the wolf does not perform in the circus

316

See your beauty without a compliment or a mirror

179

Dear Sneeze,

If you're going to happen, happen.

Don't put a stupid look on my face and then just leave.

251

You are a tornado
with pretty eyes and a heartbeat.

179

He said the spark between us was gone, so I tasered him and I'll ask him again when he wakes up. ..

157

I can be easily switched on or off...who needs a remote!

56

If you look like your passport photo, the likelihood is that you need the holiday

146

The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success

213

You shouldn't just read everything you believe.

135

You know you're getting old when your year of birth is no longer immediately visible in drop-down menus and you have to start scrolling down.

164

Sometimes you have to destroy something to create something new.

229

I'm not
afraid of heights.
I just don't like
clouds.

133

We all think we're smart
until we try to turn on
someone else's shower.

212

If we all pretend tomorrow is Sunday we might just get away with it.

172

i have this bumper sticker that says "honk if you think i'm sexy" and then i wait at green lights until i feel better about myself.

171

STARBUCKS NEEDS A SEPARATE LINE FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE THEIR SHIT TOGETHER

146

we can
still be friends

149

Staring is caring.

118

your age is the number of times you went around the sun...

232

"tried" is only one step from "tired".

Hello, couch.

126

My body is a temple...

Unfortunately,
I have no respect for religion.

142

does running away from my problems count as jogging?

278

there is always a wild side to an innocent face

182

I'm not the type of person you should put on speaker phone.

196

I used to be the kind of guy mums like.

Somehow I've ended up being the kind of guy that likes mums.

116

some people become cops because they want to make the world a better place.

some people become vandals because they want to make the world a better looking place.

93

Either I'm in love or i'm in trouble.

178

I don't have any bad habits.

I am good at all of them.

205

I'M ON THAT NEW DIET WHERE YOU EAT EVERYTHING AND HOPE FOR A BIG MIRACLE.

244

To make a long story short, don't tell it.

226

If you ran like your mouth, you'd be in good shape.

177

People
who talk shit
will be reincarnated as toilet paper •

212

In which language would you prefer I tell you how much I do not give a shit?

I have my translator app open, fire away.

182

It is not our differences that divide us. It's our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.

121

When people tell me I'm insane, the voice in my head tells me I'm normal.

141

having a vagina doesn't stop me from believing that my balls are bigger than yours.

201

Girls we love for what they are; men for what they promise to be.

87

may i
please
hold
your hand
and walk
with you
in the
quiet
comfort of
a silent
peace

102

"How do you know when it's over?"

"Maybe when you feel more in love with your memories than with the person standing right in front of you."

256

I followed my heart and it led me into the fridge.

278

i just want some
body

107

I love waving at random people, because you know for the rest of the day they're trying to figure out who the hell you were.

788

With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything

783

Wear me like you mean it.

205

Voices in your head - normal

Listening to them - common

Arguing with them - acceptable

Losing the argument - BIG PROBLEM

703

Try to be less of a fucking piece of shit than you were yesterday.

- Buddha

531

i just burnt my tongue on some food

they say the ones you love hurt you the most

797

My doctor asked if anyone in my family was suffering from mental illness. I said; "no, we all seem to enjoy it"

812

I love making people who don't like me hate me more by just being me.

612

You remind me of my big toe, cause i'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture I own

470

Here's a tissue, you have a little bullshit on your lip.

445

Ironically, the fight between the mind and the heart always ends up hurting the liver.

417

If you think the things I say out loud are bad, you should hear the things I keep to myself.

572

Dear Ex..

When you see me, i want you to recognize what you had, regret what you've lost, and realize what you're never getting back.

Sincerly Me

388

If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.

734

I like to be alone.
But I would rather be alone with you.

523

10% of conflicts are due to differences in opinion.

90% are due to wrong tone of voice.

473

soon as you realize love is in the air, somebody farts.

203

if you rearrange the letters in

MOTHER IN LAW

you get

WOMAN HITLER

184

And I just want to tell you, it takes everything in me not to call you, and I wish I could run to you, and I hope you know that every time I don't,

I almost do.

235

Maybe she's not on her period... Maybe you are just an asshole....

256

The most amazing people are the ones that don't speak much, but when they do, they shut up a lot of mouths.

295

If they think you're so easily replaced or interchangeable, they weren't the one.

122

there's a little truth behind every
"just kidding"
a little curiosity behind every
"just wondering"
a little knowledge behind every
"i don't know"
and a little emotion behind every
"i don't care"

250

Worry is just meditating on bullshit

205

In life you will find that you have to make decisions that make sense to none but you.

182

There's an ancient birth control secret. It's called "keep your legs together.

132

and there were always those nights where she preferred the rain over people. because the rain would remind her of how she should feel and people would remind her of the things she always wanted to forget.

141

own your shit,
so no one else can own you.

132

My children are dyslexic; they think 'Dad' is spelt ATM.

109

the only thing you should take personally
is your personality

166

Stop asking WHY I'm still single.

I don't ask how you're still married.

219

My biography will be titled "Be Yourself And Other Ways To Stay Single."

269

Find someone who knows you're not perfect but treats you
as if you are.

328

I Was Born To Be Awesome, Not Perfect.

338

Music always puts me in a better wood.

151

I had a great time last night...well thats what the police report says.

238

Your ass must get jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

452

I never needed you. I wanted you.

There's a difference.

333

for halloween this year we should all just dress up as who we really are

nobody would recognize anyone

211

If you asked me how many times you have crossed my mind I would say once, because you never really left.

289

i think therefore

i don't have much in common with a lot of people

236

goodnight, you said;
goodbye, i said.
and you never
thought twice
about
it.

149

I'm multitasking,

I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time

393

Stop asking me why I'm still single.

I don't ask you how you're still married.

8

FEED
YOUR
OWN
EGO
I'M
BUSY

63

santa gets all the credit

and i get all the bills...

177

We have each other and everything else is background noise.

191

Of all the books in the world, the best stories are found between the pages of a passport.

265

we live long enough to realize we don't live long

201

Let's be nothing, I heard it lasts forever.

310

If your religion is worth killing for, please start with yourself

491

Break rules, not hearts.

410

They tell me I'm weak, but I am strong. They tell me I'm worthless, but I am loved by many. They tell me I am nothing, but someday I'll be everything to someone.

252

With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything

363

If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.

459

I miss you a little... I guess you could say, a little too often, a little too much...

169

And here starts another week without me being rich or famous.

182

Karma means i can rest easy at night knowing all the people i treated badly today had it pretty much coming.

176

Listening to a bird is like listening to a woman.

Nice voice but impossible to understand.

183

I like the idea that someone, somewhere is made for you, forever.

225

It's been almost 3 years since the end of the world in 2012.

152

In 1814 Women had no rights

In 1914 Women fought for some rights

In 2014 Women are always fucking right

222

actually, we are created to love each other.

simple.
and so hard to do too.

131

your bumper sticker will not change my mind

78

die with memories,
not dreams.

329

Let's get drunk
and tell each other how
we really feel •

248

You have to learn
to swim in your own problems, before
you wade into
someone else's.

It's the only way to
avoid drowning.

73

your silence is making me listen even more

46

Thanks for pretending not to see me when I was pretending not to see you in order to avoid a miserably awkward conversation that neither of us wanted to have.

193

It's not that diabetes,
heart disease and obesity
runs in your family. It's that no one runs in your
family.

203

sad people
love the rain
because they are
no longer crying alone

216

i woke up wanting to kiss you

46

Not every "sorry" deserves an "it's okay"
in return.

61

It's like you wanna be left alone but still want people to notice your absence.

I know.

65

if she's amazing
she wont be easy
if shes easy
she wont be amazing
if shes worth it
you wont give up
if you give up
youre not worthy

3

Welcome to Plastic Surgery Addicts Anonymous.

I see a lot of new faces in the room this week and I'm very disappointed with all of you.

163

goosebumps.

when the soul comes too close to the skin, trying to burst free into the world, either in ecstasy or in fear

148

If I had spoken to my parents the way some children do now, I wouldn't be here today to share this post.

Some children need to learn the meaning of respect.

33

Thanks for pretending not to see me when I was pretending not to see you in order to avoid a miserably awkward conversation that neither of us wanted to have.

68

Our love is like dominoes.

I fall for you.

And you fall for another.

43

No matter how real your quotes are, there are some people who will never hit the like button just because its you that posted it.

47

etc.

end of thinking capacity

90

I am who I am.

Your approval isn't needed.

15

I've reached that age where my brain went from "you probably shouldn't say that" to "what the hell, let's see what happens"

51

You're so fake,
even China denied they made you.

98

WARNING

drinking alcoholic beverages before pregnancy can cause pregnancy

218

cheers to the men we love
and the jerks we got.

61

I'm okay with my crazy.

85

To be in the 1%, you have to do what 99% won't.

288

Dear Ex,

Please don't be fooled by Adele, you'll never find someone like me.

377

Dating an ex is the equivalent of failing a test you already had the answers to.

233

K
C
U
F

94

Selfie is the proof that smartphone and internet have made people so alone that they don't find a friend who can take a pic.

250

It's not that I'm tired.

It's just that I don't like standing on my feet with my eyes open.

173

See you all in church.

Just kidding, meet you at the bar.

176

It's Boldomatic's 2-Year Anniversary!

148

Apple CEO announces he's gay. Samsung CEO announces he's more gay and water resistant.

244

I am
going to
try
harder

26

With every sigh of relief, comes another grey hair.

21

Let's talk again after they find a cure for your personality.

15

sometimes the strongest people hide the deepest pain

31

Being male
is a matter of
birth

Being a man
is a matter of
age

Being a gentleman
is a matter of
choice

29

Can you actually taste the bullshit as it spills out of your mouth?

26

For some people entrance should
only be called
" exit "

22

There are some thoughts you can't avoid and some feelings you can't deny •

35

your beliefs don't make you a better person,
your behavior does

27

My 4 moods:

I'm too old for this shit,
I'm too tired for this shit,
I'm too sober for this shit,
I don't have time for this shit

28

You were so attractive until you texted me with your hideous grammar.

81

we are seen for what we pretend to be

but we are loved for who we are

38

If you could read my mind, I'm pretty sure you'd be traumatized for life.

86

A winner is just a loser who tried one more time.

72

If I only
get to do
this once,
I'm glad to
be doing
it with you.

29

It's easy to keep pretending that there's nothing wrong.
But it's harder to keep your head up and be fucking strong.

47

AND DONT FUCKING
TELL PEOPLE THAT THEYRE NOT TRYING
BECAUSE HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW IF THEYRE TRYING OR NOT
JUST BECAUSE IT DOESNT LIVE UP TO YOUR STANDARDS DOESNT MEAN THEYRE NOT TRYING

31

When things break, it's not the actual breaking that prevents them from getting back together again. It's because a little piece gets lost- the two remaining ends couldn't fit together even if they wanted to. The whole shape has changed.

43

Tears
are
words
that
need
to
be
w r i t t e n

73

If I had 24 hours to live...

Ah, fuck it. I'd probably just sit and eat chicken from a bucket.

51

Selfie is the proof that smartphone and internet have made people so alone that they don't find a friend who can take a pic.

66

Stop
looking
for
happiness
in
the
same
place
you
lost
it.

113

The reason people scream at each other when they are angry is because their hearts get further away and can't hear each other.

The reason people whisper when they are in love is that their hearts are very close.

49

I just arrived at that point of the week where I want it to be friday or go back to bed..

43

I'm so poor I can't even pay attention.

39

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

29

F CK.
i just need U

19

The greatest gift you can give a special person is your TIME, it's like you're giving a portion of your life that you can never bring back.

23

your naked body should only belong to those who fall in love with your naked soul.

81

Explore.
Dream.
Discover.
Believe.

138

Free to choose,
but not free from the consequences of the choice.

20

People will forget what you said.
People will forget what you did.
But people will never forget how you made them feel.

36

No, you're not fat. You're just easy to see.

77

You can't laugh at yourself?

Don't worry.
I can do it for you.

63

if you're not happy with yourself, you won't be happy with somebody else.

48

I'm sorry, what language are you speaking?

It sounds like bullshit.

73

hipsters don't say "LOL" they say "LSIMHBIWFEFMTALOL"

(Laughing silently in my head because it wasn't funny enough for me to actually laugh out loud)

63

Some people are like clouds.

When they disappear,
it gets a brighter day.

84

so many humans so little humanity

78

Welcome to our society.
You will be judged on what you wear, your taste in music, what you look like and how you act.

- Enjoy your stay.

20

Smile..
It might
not make your problems disappear,
but it will stop people from asking what's wrong with you •

67

you see the
world in ways
that other
people dont.

it's your gift to
see the beauty
and the horror in
ordinary things.

30

I visited my psycho- therapist the other day...

he cried a lot.

33

Before you judge me, make sure you're perfect.

100

my life is based on a true story

59

Don't try to understand women. Women understand women, and they hate each other.

66

Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anyone about.

58

I fell in love with your personality. Your looks are just a bonus.

90

Don't make me angry and then tell me to calm down.

That's like shooting someone and then wondering why he's bleeding.

126

Respect old people.

They gratuated school without Google and Wikipedia.

136

I dont know what they are called, the spaces between seconds but I think of you always in those intervals.

14

Silence is golden,
unless you have kids, then silence is just suspicious.

93

secret to stay young:

live honestly, eat slowly
and lie about your age.

23

IDIOTITIS:

A disease which causes the brain to shut down and the mouth to keep talking. Thousands are affected. Might be contagious.

Best defense:
Slap and run!

61

Work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like nobody is watching you.

53

i want you to know that someone out there cares.

not me, but someone does.

38

I don't know if I did right or wrong but I always did my best.

80

All that I am,
or ever hope to be,
I owe to you.

84

If you can love the wrong person that much, imagine how much you can love the right one.

115

F.R.I.E.N.D.S: Fight for you. Respect you. Include you. Encourage you. Need you. Deserve you. Stand by you.

49

Congratulations on your ability to create drama out of absolutely nothing •

67

WE NEED:
MORE FUN
MORE MUSIC
MORE SLEEP
MORE LAUGHTER
MORE HUGS
MORE TOGETHERNESS
MORE SMILES
MORE KISSING
MORE BLISS
MORE PASSION
MORE LOVE

49

Smiling doesn't always mean you're happy. Sometimes, it simply means that you're a strong person.

67

Girls who claim that a lot of guys are after them should keep in mind that low prices always attract many customers.

84

Good things come to those who wait.

Crap.

16

cheers to the men we love
and the jerks we got.

50

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

111

And the brain said to the beaten up heart "you never learn, do you?"

74

Do you
ever just
wanna grab someone by the shoulders, look them deep in the eyes and whisper, "No one gives a fuck" •

46

I have seen the best of you, and the worst of you; and I choose both.

242

I don't give a fuck.
I mean I do, but fuck it.

37

? ?
?
':::::::'

SILENCE!
I KILL YOU!

63

laugh and the world laughs with you,

snore and you sleep alone.

19

caffeine is bad for you, sugar is bad for you, alcohol is bad for you, but don't worry, cause that's bad for you too.

71

words are not enough

51

I'm okay with my crazy.

48

all I want is what I'm worth.

25

Of course your opinion matters,

Just not to me.

162

The most difficult part about walking away from someone is realizing that they don't care enough to attempt to stop you.

26

It is not our differences that divide us. It's our inability to recognize, accept, and celebrate those differences.

42

Being honest may not get you a lot of friends but it'll always get you the right ones
-John Lennon

30

when I see you I feel scared to touch you, when I touch you I feel scared to kiss you,
when I kiss you I feel scared to hug you,
when I hug you I feel scared to love you,
when I love you I feel scared to lose you ....

48

Always love a women for her personality.

They have like 10, so you can choose.

74

having a vagina doesn't stop me from believing that my balls are bigger than yours.

82

Men who say women belong in the kitchen obviously dont know what to do with them in the bedroom.

41

$oooO ( ) \ ( \,,,,) Oooo ( ) ) / (,,,,/ Catch Me If You Can$

55

Opinions are facts marinated in bullshit.

51

i love you not only for what you are, but for what i am when i am with you

120

I love listening to lies when I know the truth...

226

Life is like a camera. Just focus on what's important, capture the good times, develop from the negatives, and if things don't turn out - take another shot.

95

my life.
my choices.
my mistakes.
my lessons.
not your business.

136

YOU SHOULD STOP TELLING LIES ABOUT ME.

OR I WILL START TO TELL THE TRUTH ABOUT YOU.

68

Don't worry about those who talk behind your back, they're behind you for a reason.

99

Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it.

70

The synonym for reality is offline.

226

THIS IS BY FAR YOUR MOST FUCKED UP IDEA EVER... I'LL BE THERE IN 10MINUTES.

208

better
to loose
a lover
than
to love
a loser

173

I'm gonna ignore you so hard you'll start to doubt your own existance.

73

Music is life. That's why our hearts have beats.

120

the truth only hurts when it should.

72

bad decisions make good stories

423

BEAUTIFUL THINGS HAPPEN WHEN YOU DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM

THE NEGATIVE SHIT

132

Promote what you love instead of bashing what you hate.

620

Everyone's curious

But no one really cares.

178

You look like something
I draw with my left hand.

959

YOUNG, WILD AND RETARDED.

262

I'm in competition
with no one..
have no desire
to play the game of being better than anyone..
just simply trying to be better than the person I was yesterday •

445

If you're looking for sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between shit and syphillis!

407

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