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Posts Liked by katnissonfire

I'm so lazy, that if I got an award for laziness, I would have someone else accept it on my behalf.

5

$19.99, because $20 is an outrageous amount of money.

11

Patient: "How much longer do I have doc?"
Doctor: "Ten."
Patient: "Ten what?"
Doctor: "Nine..."

9

Life's a bitch. Oh no, wait... That's you.

19

You must have been born on a highway, because that's where most accidents happen.

7

The ridiculous thing is i'm pretty smart but at the same time i manage to be the dumbest person alive.

6

I wanted to kill the sexiest person alive...

But suicide's a crime.

18

I'm sorry if i've ever told you the same story twice it's just that i don't have an interesting life and cool things rarely happen to me.

13

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